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Angelina Jolie Stuns In First Rollerblading Competition Since Double Mastectomy
ARCADIA, CA—Famed actress and activist Angelina Jolie wowed Grindside Street Comp spectators Sunday in her first public aggressive inline skating competition since undergoing a preventive double mastectomy earlier this year. The Onion Tweet This Post
George W. Bush Having Trouble Finding Decent Cocaine Since Leaving White House
CRAWFORD, TX—Citing his dramatically reduced level of influence and his separation from old acquaintances in Washington, former president George W. The Onion Tweet This Post
Rand Paul’s Funny Obamacare Codes Have Been in Development Since 1994
At a Republican Party event in Iowa earlier this month, Senator Rand Paul of Kentucky did a bit about the scale of Obamacare's diagnostic coding. It killed. The only problem was that Paul's critique of the new codes are a critique of codes that aren't new and aren't Obamacare. A lot of them aren't even [...]
4 Americans killed since 2009 in US drone strikes
WASHINGTON (AP) — The Obama administration acknowledged for the first time Wednesday that four American citizens have been killed in drone strikes in Pakistan and Yemen since 2009. The disclosure to Congress comes on the eve of a major national security speech by President Barack Obama in which he plans to pledge more transparency to [...]
Holder: U.S. killed four Americans overseas in drone strikes since 2009
Attorney General Eric Holder informed Congress on Wednesday that the U.S. had killed four Americans in drone strikes since 2009 – radical cleric Anwar al-Awlaki and three others who were “not specifically targeted.” Holder’s disclosure, first reported by the New York Times, came a day before President Barack Obama was to defend his counter-terrorism strategy [...]
American Voices: American Consumers Happiest Since 2007
Americans’ confidence in the U.S. economy reached its highest level since July 2007, according to the latest reading of a leading consumer sentiment index. The Onion Tweet This Post
Open thread: The worst thing since the last thing that was worse than Watergate
In case you missed it: Jon Stewart blows the lid off Benghazirama: Tweet This Post
Austerity cost U.S. up to 2.2 million jobs in weakest recovery since WWII
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Is Andrew Cuomo the Shrewdest Politician Since LBJ?
New York: “For all his speechifying about the ‘us’ of government, he runs a government of one, controlling decisions large and small. And the way Cuomo wins his battles–strong-arming and horse-trading; a mastery of talking past inconvenient questions and facts–tends to antagonize enemies and allies, as in the most recent round of budget wrangling, in [...]
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