From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE…
Late Night Snark: Lizards and Penguins and Baboons, Oh My!
“Mitt Romney once did a photo op at a zoo. That was a big mistake, because he stood next to the chameleon and he changed colors.”
“Mitt Romney, honest to god, I think is an inspiration to kids all over this country who, sadly, were born without a personality.”
Jimmy Fallon reading a tweet: If Mitt Romney was in the room right now, what would you say to him?”
President Obama: I’d say, ‘Hey, Mitt.’
“During a campaign event, Newt Gingrich was bitten by a penguin. It was feeding time and Newt and the penguin were fighting over pieces of squid.”
“Republicans release a new anti-Obama attack ad. I can’t wait to hear what country he was born in now!”
“Scientists reported that baboons are capable of recognizing words. Though it seems the two words they can’t recognize are ‘Stop’ and ‘Masturbating.’”
And one year ago, I peed my pants over this hilarity:
Bill Maher: The tea party is not all Republican?
Former RNC Chairman Michael Steele: No, it’s not! I don’t know the exact percentage, but it is not all Republicans!
You may uncork my dinner when ready, Gridley. Your west coast-friendly edition of Cheers and Jeers starts below the fold… [Swoosh!!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!!]